Worried that a friend, family member or colleague is behaving differently?
Noticing changes in someone you care about can feel worrying, confusing or uncertain – and it’s okay to feel unsure about what to do next.
We all have mental health in the same way that we all have physical health. But it can be much harder to know if someone is experiencing problems with their mental wellbeing.
Sometimes people don’t have the words to explain how they’re feeling – or may say they’re “fine” even when something doesn’t feel right. If you’ve noticed changes or have a sense that something’s off, it’s okay to trust that instinct.
You don’t need to have all the answers. Simply noticing, listening, and caring can matter a lot.
Spotting the signs that someone might be struggling
Everyone’s mental health can change at different times and we will all experience ups and downs along the way.
It’s important not to make assumptions about what someone might be experiencing or going through. However, some of the common signs that someone might be struggling can include:
Changes in mood
- low mood or changes in mood, from very high to very low
- being easily irritated, overreacting to situations or appearing aggressive
- sounding hopeless or very self-critical
Changes in behaviour
- withdrawing from family, friends, colleagues or fellow students
- avoiding situations or loss of interest in usual activities
- coming in late to work or college or being absent, or, not turning up to social arrangements
- changes in appetite or sleeping less or more than usual
- working longer hours than usual or trying to do too many things at once
- not taking care of personal appearance or leaving living space untidy/unclean (if this is unusual or out of character)
- posting worrying messages on social media or going quiet when they’re usually very active
- increased drug use or drinking more alcohol than usual
- reckless or addictive behaviour that puts them in danger
Changes in thinking, feeling and physical sensations
- feeling anxious, panicky or worrying more
- poor concentration, low energy, tiredness or being easily distracted
- loss of confidence or feeling overwhelmed by tasks
- expressing false beliefs or hearing/seeing things that others do not hear or see
Download or print the information above as a pdf:
What are the possible signs that someone is struggling with their mental health?
If they don’t feel ready to talk
People often decide whether to open up based on how safe they feel and what kind of response they expect. Some may share only a small part of what’s going on – or not feel ready to talk at all.
Letting someone know you’re there, without pressure, can still make a big difference.
Other ways to help
Talking isn’t the only way to help. Sometimes practical support – helping with small tasks, reducing immediate pressures, or simply spending time together – can be just as important.
Next to How can I talk to someone about their mental health? >
If you are concerned about someone under the age of 18, please visit MindMate.
Last updated: February 2026