How to help someone in crisis

Supporting someone in a mental health crisis can feel frightening or overwhelming. You don’t have to have all the answers – being present, listening, and helping them feel safer can make a real difference.

This page is for anyone supporting someone in a lot of distress – including friends, family members, colleagues, volunteers, and frontline workers.

What is a mental health crisis?

A mental health crisis is when someone feels unable to cope and needs urgent support.

Everyone experiences crisis differently. For some people, it can feel like reaching a breaking point. For others, it may feel overwhelming, chaotic, or as though everything is crashing down.

A crisis is not defined by a diagnosis or specific behaviour. What matters is how distressed or unsafe the person feels, and their need for timely help and support.

Crisis can look different for different people

A mental health crisis doesn’t always mean someone wants to end their life.

It can also include:

intense emotional distress or feeling overwhelmed
panic or shutdown
urges to self-harm
feeling unsafe or unable to cope
sudden changes in mood or behaviour
distress linked to relationships or feeling abandoned

Whatever someone is experiencing, the most important things are helping them feel heard, safe, and supported – and getting extra help when needed.

If you’re worried about someone right now

Check if they are safe

If there’s immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E

If not, stay with them (or stay in contact), listen, and help them reach support.

For urgent emotional support, call NHS 111 or visit our Need urgent help? page.

Samaritans also have guidance on what to do if you think it’s an emergency.

If you’re not with the person, you can request a welfare check by calling 999 and giving their location.

Signs someone may be in crisis

Not everyone shows clear warning signs, and some people hide how they feel. But changes in behaviour can be a clue.

You might notice someone:

talking about death or wanting to disappear
expressing hopelessness or feeling like a burden
saying nothing will ever improve
withdrawing from friends or family
using alcohol or drugs more than usual
looking for ways to harm themselves
giving away possessions or saying goodbye
appearing unusually calm after being very low
struggling to cope with everyday things

Some people reach crisis point suddenly, especially when stresses build up.

How to start the conversation

Talking about difficult feelings can be hard – but it’s really important.

You might begin with:

“How are you really feeling right now?”
“I’ve noticed you’ve not been coming out much – is everything okay?”

Listen without judgement. Try not to rush to fix things. Feeling heard can help someone feel less alone.

For more practical tips on listening, asking questions, and supporting someone to open up, see our page on How can I talk to someone about their mental health?

If you’re worried about suicide

If you’re worried they might be thinking about suicide, it’s okay to ask directly:

“Are you thinking about suicide?”

Asking does not put the idea in someone’s head – it can reduce risk and open the door to support.

Encourage professional help where possible, and offer to help them make contact.

If they already have a crisis or safety plan (for example through Leeds and York Partnership NHS Foundation Trust), encourage them to follow it. If not, you can help them call NHS 111 and choose the mental health option – ideally with their awareness and consent.

Different communication needs

Everyone experiences crisis differently. Some people – including autistic people, people with ADHD, or people who feel overwhelmed by noise, questions, or eye contact – may find it hard to talk in the moment.

They might communicate better by text, writing things down, or using short answers.

Try to:

use clear, simple language

avoid asking lots of questions at once

offer choices rather than instructions

give time and quiet space where possible

Some people may also need extra time, visual information, or support with language – go at their pace where you can.

Small adjustments can help someone feel safer and more in control.

Intense distress, self-harm and panic

People experience crisis in different ways. What you’re seeing might look like intense emotion, panic, shutdown, or urges to hurt themselves.

For some people, self-harm is a way of coping with overwhelming feelings or distress – not a wish to die. Panic attacks or sudden emotional surges can also feel frightening and out of control. These experiences are painful and real, and the person deserves care, understanding and support.

When someone feels overwhelmed, what often helps most is safety, connection and calm presence.

You could:

stay with them (if it feels safe to do so)
listen without judgement or trying to fix things
help them slow their breathing or ground themselves
ask what might help them feel safer right now

If injuries are serious, or urges feel very strong or unmanageable, it’s okay to seek urgent help.

You could also try simple calming techniques together, such as slow breathing or grounding.

For practical tips on supporting someone during panic, visit our page on How to help someone having a panic attack.

Lived experience advice

When talking to someone in crisis with suicidal thoughts, simply directing them to services can sometimes do more harm than good if done in the wrong way. Genuine human empathy can do more to help than finding somewhere to “pass” them to ever will. Help someone navigate extra support but ensure you hold space for them too. In particular:

Help someone to be safe for now (in whatever way works for them).

Ensure people feel in control of this process. Taking control away at this time can cause more distress.

Be mindful of becoming desensitised to suicide and ensure that staff working in these areas are protected from emotional burnout.

For more lived experience perspectives listen to the Surviving Crisis podcast series coproduced by Leeds Mind Suicide Prevention Volunteers, who all have lived experience of being impacted by suicide.
Notes from the Leeds Suicide Prevention Network (LSPN) meeting, July 2024, by Jules Stimson, Network Chair.

Taking care of yourself

Supporting someone in crisis can be emotionally and physically challenging.

Try to:

set boundaries to protect your own wellbeing
talk to someone you trust about how you’re feeling
take time to rest and recharge

Your wellbeing also matters.

Helpful resources

Creating Hope Through Language – guidance from the West Yorkshire Suicide Prevention Programme on what to say (and what not to say)
Ask, Assist, Act – signs someone may be suicidal and how to respond, from the MECC Community of Improvement.
Suicide Prevention – Guidance for frontline workers and volunteers from Leeds City Council.
20 minutes to save a life – a short suicide awareness video from Zero Suicide Alliance.
Surviving Crisis podcast series co-produced by Leeds Mind Suicide Prevention Volunteers.